Beyond Skyline

http://slightlywarped.com/beyond-skyline/

I’m sure by now you’ve heard everyone and their dog talk about what a shitty movie Skyline was.   Looking back at my review of the movie, I see that I didn’t even bother reviewing it.

Jesus, that’s on par with shooting a filmmaker’s mother in the face!

Here’s a quick review:  It was a boring, by the numbers alien invasion movie with characters that no one liked, action that lulled audiences to sleep, and an ending that smacked of a cheap cliffhanger no one asked to be resolved so, naturally, Hollywood decided to resolve it.

Sure, we can’t get Tron 3, but we can get Skyline 2?   Then again, perhaps we should put away our hate and ire… isn’t it time to get…   Beyond Skyline?

Yes, Beyond Skyline, the sequel that absolutely no one demanded is here to answer all of the questions you never had.    This time, the alien invasion is recapped, but from a completely different point of view — this time we’re following a policeman and his estranged son.   When the aliens invade, they decide to get the hell out of town but, before they can make it, they are taken on board the ship and separated and now, the policeman must find his son before his son’s brain is sucked out and he becomes a alien slave soldier.

It’s like Beasts of No Nation, only it makes no sense and there is 40 percent less molestation.

To be completely fair, given that Skyline is a pulsating piece of poop, Beyond Skyline is surprisingly decent.   Sure, you can tell that this is bare-bones no-frills filmmaking, a step down from Skyline‘s rung, but in many ways, I actually think that helps.   This time around, the characters are okay.  Not great, but okay, but what I really respected about this movie is that it takes several left turns and ends up in territories that you didn’t think it would.

Most of this stuff is already spoiled in the trailers, so I don’t think I’m saying anything new here, but I’ll throw up that spoiler warning all the same if you’re a sensitive little bitch.

Spoiler Alert

So, once the policeman (and yes, he has a name and, no, I don’t remember what it is) and his son (ditto) are taken aboard the ship, they meet the two (kind of) surviving characters from the first Skyline movie played by more cheaper actors.   Not-Eric Balfour is an alien solider now, his brain having been sucked out and put in a biosuit thingie, and his girlfriend is pregnant with a super-baby growing like a weed inside of her.

I didn’t give a shit about these characters in the first movie, but I have to give Beyond Skyline props for not only tying into the story from the first Skyline, but actually making it relevant to the second movie’s plot.   They could have easily just ignored the first movie and it would have been fine, but instead they risked it to dip back into their own damaged mythology and it paid off for them.

After all this, the ship crashes in Laos where the rest of the movie takes place which turns Beyond Skyline into a cross between Independence Day and Apocalypse Now and it’s actually kind of awesome.

Spoiler Alert

Now, I’m not saying that it’s amazing or great because, let’s face it, this is a direct to video sequel to a shitty movie that didn’t deserve one, but I have to admit, it’s serviceable in a very trashy way.   This genuinely turns into a fun movie in several respects, from the sudden tonal shift and change in location to the final fight at the end between humans and aliens that suddenly turns it into a kung-fu mish-mash.   How could you not have a soft spot for that kind of insane nonsense?

The ending of the movie is pretty nonsensical, but it keeps with the spirit of the first and, by that point, you’ve swallowed so much nonsense, your brain kinda just goes, “All right, where are you taking us next, Skyline?”

I’ll be okay if they don’t take us anywhere and this is the end of the road for these movies, but if there is another sequel, I’ll gladly give it a look and see where this crazy-ass sci-fi funny farm bounces to next.

About the author

Jason Donner

Jason Donner devoured the universe and you are all living inside him.