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Movie Reviews

Movie Reviews

Independence Day Resurgence

I wouldn’t go so far as to call this a horrible movie because, honestly, even if it is a hollow shell of its predecessor, it still has some fun action and special effects sequences and does have some interesting world-building going on. That’s the problem, though… the world building looked a lot more interesting than the world-exploding.

Movie Reviews

The Conjuring 2

These are characters who care about each other and seem more real than the “edgy” characters that seem to keep getting pooped out into these movies. Not once did I think, “Oh, I hope that asshole dies” like I did in Sinister 2 or the last Paranormal Activity movie – it’s the Poltergeist effect. Make the audience love your characters and then make the characters go through Hell.

Movie Reviews

Captain America: Civil War

This isn’t the story of two superheroes being dicks to each other… it’s a story of hard choices, gray areas, and no road home. This is a story of divided loyalties, undying friendship, and problems with no real solutions. Realistically, you can side with either Tony or Steve in this movie… both of them are right, both of them are wrong.

Movie Reviews

The Jungle Book

Rarely has a fantasy adventure reached the levels of both fantasy and adventure that The Jungle Books reaches… it is wide-eyed and wonderful, a colorful and joyous spectacle that never loses its heart or its inclination simply to be fun.

Movie Reviews

Fifty Shades of Black

I’m not one to judge a person based on their tastes in movies, but if you actually liked Fifty Shades of Black, you’re a drag on our entire species and, for the good of the human race, you should be isolated and sterilized to keep your seed from polluting our gene pool.