2016 – Superhero Movie
After a colossal fuck up where a lot of innocent people die, Captain America and the Avengers are told they have to fall under the authoritah of the United Nations or break up the band. Some of the Avengers, namely Iron Man and a few others, decide it’s a good deal, but Cap has his misgivings especially when his friend Bucky, the Winter Soldier, resurfaces and he’s forced to take a side against his teammates and the rest of the world.
Remember what I said about Batman v. Superman being a fun movie? It still is, but it’s a meaningless popcorn blockbuster. Civil War, on the other hand, has got the spectacle of superheroes fighting each other which is always a bonus, but unlike Superman Sissy-Fights Batman, it’s got more going for it. This isn’t the story of two superheroes being dicks to each other… it’s a story of hard choices, gray areas, and no road home. This is a story of divided loyalties, undying friendship, and problems with no real solutions. Realistically, you can side with either Tony or Steve in this movie… both of them are right, both of them are wrong. This is a movie that invites debate, arguments, and the occasional fist-fight but, gosh-darnit, you will be talking about it later.
I liked Batman Bitch-Slaps Superman, I really did, but it’s the kind of movie you can’t resist but talk shit about because so much of it was incompetent style over substance. Civil War strives to be an all out movie experience with characters intrinsically motivated by a number of different and believable factors and things set into motion with the very first Avengers movie boiling to a frothy head. This movie is both exciting and thoughtful… a film put together by someone who knows the characters, respects the audience, and remembers that the number one reason we want to go to movies in the first goddamn place is to have fucking fun.
Do you know what fun is, Zack Snyder? Do you!?
I just loved the shit out of every glorious frame of this movie and will say, with some reservation since I probably am wearing some rose-colored glasses, that this could very well be the best Marvel movie of all time… possibly one of the greatest superhero movies of all time.
With reservation. God knows I’ve gotten hype-boners before and, let me tell you, this one is throbbing like crazy.
In addition to the overall great movie that we are presented with, we’re reintroduced to Spider-Man and Peter Parker. While I’m not sure how I feel about a milf Aunt May, I gotta say, I love Tom Holland in this role. I wasn’t a huge fan of Andrew Garfield’s turn as Spidey, but I liked Tobey Maguire’s go at it. Tom Holland, however… hell, there’s really no other way of saying it… he is Spider-Man. He’s got the look, he’s got the voice, he’s got the energy… I even like that they’ve gone super-young with Spider-Man now because it feels right… it feels fresh like something they haven’t done before. Personally, I can’t wait for the new Spider-Man movie – maybe they’ll do something we haven’t seen in a long time and do a film that isn’t pure shit.
No one else is talking about the other big debut, so I will…. Black Panther! I’m a little biased because I personally love Black Panther and, in this movie, the man is an absolute beast… he steals every action sequences he’s in, he’s undeniably cool, and now I’m looking forward to his movie as well.
Captain America: Civil War is an amazing superhero punch-it-out where friends fight friends and nothing is ever the same once it’s over. There’s no easy road home for these soldiers, but it’s the consequences to their actions that make the movie even that much more important. I’m trying to stay spoiler free here, but let’s just say that every decision matters in Civil War and will matter for a long time to come.